Yes we can!

How often have you heard parents lamenting the fact that their children have gone off track or that they are wondering aimlessly through life with little sense of ambition?

Frustrated parents of those children who have dared to go against the grain and eek out a unique space in the world often also harbour a sense of failure in not having accomplished their vision for their child.

Recall the words penned by the much feted Lebanese poet, Khalil Gibran, in his seminal work, The Prophet, first published in 1924.

He wrote: ‘Your children are not your children. They are the sons and the daughters of life’s longing for itself. They come through you but they are not from you and though they are with you, they belong not to you’.

Angst
The angst is understandable; it’s only natural that we would want the best for our children but maybe we set ourselves up for disappointment by typecasting our children’s lives from the minute they are old enough to recite the alphabet?

What ever religious doctrine you may subscribe to, the source books all speak of a parent’s responsibility to shepherd our children through life. So, it is widely accepted that a parents role is to love, guide and protect their offspring.

So, relentless efforts to instil strong moral fibre, a robust work ethic and a sense of community register as a good success rating in the parenting realm. However, if, as Gibran states, our children represent ‘life’s longing for itself’ then where do you draw the line? Who holds the destiny chalk, you or your children?

Gibran went on further to say: ‘you may give them […children] your love but not your thoughts. For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls for their souls dwell in a place of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams’.

Fittingly, these words, when set against the gloomy backdrop of current global financial crises, serve as an invitation for us to review our perspectives of parenthood. Gibran’s tomorrow is now!

Wayward
Speak to the ‘wayward’ children; those who respond to ‘life’s longing for itself’ and you will hear stories of a journey deep with conflict as they wield a double-edged sword of respect for their parent’s desires countered against their soul’s yearnings.

This leaves many tossing out passion in search of steady incomes no matter how soul destroying the career. Those brave enough to stick their neck out are often confused as they navigate through feelings of betrayal to the parental vision to pure joy as they touch their dream.

Is there room for a happy medium? Parenting styles that seek to nurture the soul vision while building the foundation blocks of ambition, drive and passion? We better get ready to find it, because today our children say, yes we can!

Ubuntu: Movement of da people

When I think of random acts of kindness, I recall beautiful childhood memories when unexpected rainfall brought visitors to the house. They were not always known to us, often arbitrary people, taking shelter on my grandparent's porch while the rain passed. No permission needed. No one blinked an eye; it was the most natural thing in the world.

Thankfully, there are still places where such experiences are commonplace. After all, it's woven into our sinew, the need to give and receive and to really care. It's a basic part of who we are, isn't it? Such exchanges speak to love and simply being human.

Reclaiming humanity
The world is waking up to speedily reclaim what was rapidly becoming undervalued - our sense of community. Have you noticed how many movements are gaining momentum these days? As we read about the global slow food movement, do we heed the call to trash the quick-mix pasta sauces and cornmeal porridge in a microwave and swiftly return to savour rich aromas usually reserved for the Sunday table?

Some currently riding the wave in South Africa, the self-descriptive slow thought movement, and the moral regeneration movement, speak volumes about a growing need to redefine how we engage with one another, be it at home, at work or in our leisure spaces.

At one of the many Heritage Day events celebrated in South Africa on the September 24, the third Ubuntu Award was presented to retired Cuban President Fidel Castro. Created by South Africa's National Heritage Council, the annual award honours people who consistently embody humanitarian values which anchor the African philosophy of Ubuntu. Former President Nelson Mandela and Former Zambian President Kenneth Kaunda have also been recognised as beacons of ubuntu.

Ubuntu is notoriously difficult to explain in English without losing the nuance of the philosophy. Ubuntu principles are deeply rooted in a lifestyle framework where every person is knitted together in a behaviour code which upholds community and culture over individuality.

Essence of ubuntu
The essence of ubuntu emphasises hospitality, tolerance, appreciation and respect for one another. The spirit of Ubuntu is what anchors genuine acts of giving without asking, 'what's in it for me?'

What's in it for you and me is the chance to rescue our collective living values and reframe them in our everyday lives. It's an opportunity to move away from lifestyle trends that are fast eroding our soul. In placing humanity at the centre, we embrace the opportunity to revive harmonious relations with one another. So, yes, come join the Ubuntu movement where we chose 'we' over me, knowing that without you, I cannot be.

Email: d.empressheart@gmail.com. Blog: http://femail heart.blogspot.com.

Soul banks – the wealth option?

Money makes the world go round, or so we’re told. In today’s world where the cost of living is spiralling out of our stratosphere, money, the lack of it or the desire for more of it is a permanent discussion topic.

Even before the price of a bag of rice tripled, dreams about chasing sweet money pots at the end of rainbows were key talking points from the liming spot to the beauty salon. Is money the real deal? How many of us talk of wealth as opposed to money and, how many of us have dared to imagine what true wealth looks and feels like?

It seems we automatically associate money with happiness whilst knowing the so called ‘rich and famous’ are often amongst the most insecure, unhappy people. I wonder whether the focus on money as opposed to wealth actually steers us along a long road with pot holes called broke, going anywhere but to a comfortably space of knowing and believing we are wealthy no matter the bank balance.

A few days ago, I had the dubious delight of attending a Soul Session hosted by Old Mutual – a South African financial institution. The Soul Sessions, hosted by two of South Africa’s it celebs – Fezile Mpela and Sophie Ndaba featured motivational talks, speed networking (yes, like speed dating only with above the waist business in mind), fashion, topical discussions and saving and investment tips. It was an engaging afternoon.

A chat with organiser, Lebogang Mkhize revealed that Old Mutual is reverse engineering money management for us, their clients. Being in the wealth creation business, they believe that events like the Soul Sessions address our lifestyle needs while propelling us further along the road to unlocking wealth. They are convinced the link to wealth is deeply embedded within us – in our souls. Food for thought? They are definitely on the money!

Ever considered your soul as your private wealth bank? Is the concept of being wealthy something that resonates, excites or is it scary, indulgent even? Possibly, it boils down to the way we’ve been brought up? Were you raised to expect an abundantly wealthy life as a birthright no matter your social-economic standing?

Or, maybe yours was to seek an education in the quest to work and modestly provide for your loved ones? Maybe neither, maybe both and where was your soul placed in the picture?

What shapes your wealth space? Is it soul anchor or a consumption orientation? Many of us grew up seeing grandma hiding money under the mattress, in books, also heard about keeping vex money or saving for that rainy day. We’ve probably also internalised notions of money being the root of all evil and so, consciously shunned the idea of being wealthy.

By shifting our focus away from money and living our soul-inspired journey, we may see that the eyes are the window to our soul and the soul is our window to life-enriching wealth for all.